Fancy New Toy

"What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"

"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

--The Velveteen Rabbit, by Margery Williams

After many years as a self-proclaimed film snob, I swore I’d never go digital. I have always loved the smell of film, hoped someday I’d have a darkroom to play in, thought digital photography was making everyone lazy because “you can just delete what you don’t like.” But I finally caved. As of this weekend, I am the proud owner of a Nikon d80 and I cant wait to figure out how to use it.

I spent a good bit of yesterday neurotically reading the owner’s manual. I’m not usually one to read a manual page by page, but there are just too many buttons to “wing it.” So far, my favorite thing from the directions: “When operating the viewfinder diopter control with your eye to the viewfinder, care should be taken not to put your finger or fingernail in your eye accidentally.” Awesome advice.

I did feel a little pang of sadness packing away the body of my film camera. I’m sure I’ll still get it out from time to time, but it is definitely like the old toy that gets put away for a while in favor of the new one with all the bells and whistles. But that “old toy” traveled a lot of miles with me and took a lot of great shots… And as my first “real” camera, it has helped to develop (seriously, no pun intended) a hobby I hope to continue for many years.

Is it weird to get all poetic and sentimental about a camera??

Anyway, I thought I’d share a few of my favorite pictures taken over the last few years…

Wait Until Tomorrow

This is why John Mayer could be my boyfriend.

Hang Up...Hold On...

A couple weeks ago my dad was down in Cincinnati, helping me with some house projects. Before we started, I went through my CD collection, found five that we could agree on and put them in the stereo on shuffle.

(It’s funny…when we went on car trips when I was little, there wasn’t much beyond Fleetwood Mac and the Beatles that we could all be happy with (especially when I was all about eighties glam rock)…now that I’m older, I find that I like a lot of “their” music…and they like a lot of “mine.”)

But I digress…

One of the CDs I pulled out that day was Arlo Guthrie’s Outlasting the Blues. When I was a kid, this was one of the albums everyone in the car could sing along to, but it’s not one that I listen to all that often these days.

One song in particular struck me as funny…. Here are the lyrics to “Telephone.” (If they’re not completely accurate, blame it on the lyric site I found…)

Every morning just as soon as it's light
Get out of bed and I'm feeling alright
Make me some coffee and I sit down alone
The rest of the day I'm on the telephone

Hang up, hold on
You got a dime so you come on so strong
Save your money and let me be
Hang up the phone and quit bothering me

I got a phone in my bedroom and one in the barn
A phone in my car and one in the yard
A phone on my saddle for when I'm out on the range
A phone in my pocket for when I'm down at the grange

Hang up, hold on
You got a dime so you come on so strong
Save your money and let me be
Hang up the phone and quit bothering me

Now with devaluation all over the land
The whole wide world has got more money in their hand
They'll be calling me up from Peking and Nome
I'm going to rip out my telephone

(It probably loses something if you don’t know the tune that goes with it…)

Anyway, I remember liking the song when I was a kid because it was just so ridiculous. How could you ever have a phone in your pocket? Or in your car? Hmmm…

Tyler’s the Ultimate. Just ask him.

Most people know I like to cook. My mom turned me onto Tyler Florence and I have to say his cookbooks look great, but I cant stomach his tv show, Tyler’s Ultimate. Typically I look through the tv guide to see what he’s going to make and if it looks good, I’ll record it.

Last night, I watched the “rainy day” episode. The recipes du jour? Tyler’s ULTIMATE chicken noodle soup and Tyler’s ULTIMATE grilled cheese. In case you were wondering, everything he does is ULTIMATE.

My thoughts as I watched:

1. ABSOLUTELY. Does he HAVE to use that word in every sentence? Does someone pay him per use? Also beautiful and fantastic. He must get extra points for 'absolutely beautiful' and 'absolutely fantastic.'

2. BOOM. Every time he puts something in the oven. Every time he puts something in a bowl. Every time he puts a pan on the stove. Boom.

3. ADJECTIVES. Somewhere in his contract it must say that every sentence must have at least three adjectives. "We're going to cut these onions. Look at how absolutely beautiful and fragrant these fresh delicious onions are." Some things don't need adjectives. Onions are onions. Just cut them and move on.

4. THE INTRO. It’s so forced and scripted. I saw in the title what you're planning to cook. I don't need a poem about rainy days and the sunshine in the kitchen. Fire your writing staff and just show me how to cook.

The man just talks too much. It’s a shame, because his recipes usually look really good. Last night’s grilled cheese – excuse me…“last night’s ULTIMATE grilled cheese -- glorious artisan bread with fragrant, beautiful pesto and fresh, delicious mozzarella cheese” – looked delicious.

But seriously...he's ABSOLUTELY annoying.

On the chopping block next week? Rachel Ray

Jon Stories, pt 1

A few people have said that the Jonathan entry should be a series. I don’t know if I’ll make it a series, but I do have a couple funny Jon Stories worth sharing.

My parents went out for his annual progress meeting the other day (they were called IEP meetings when he was in school…they have a name now, but I don’t know it off-hand). Overall, Jon is doing well and everyone there loves him. But they did share these three stories that my parents and I got a kick out of…

They’re always working with Jon to become more independent (as much as he can be) in everyday tasks. Over the years, they’ve worked on getting him to bring his dishes to the sink after meals, putting his clothes in the hamper when he changes and putting things away. And the latest – bringing his clothes hamper to the laundry room when it’s full and back to his room when it’s empty. Amazingly, he does it…but as soon as he gets back to his room, he empties his closet of clean clothes into the hamper because hampers are supposed to be full of clothes. In his head, having an empty hamper isn’t right, so he fills it. In the meeting, it was suggested that maybe they put a towel in the hamper that can always be there – so it’s never empty…and then someone suggested a shirt or other article of clothing – because knowing Jon, the hamper should have clothes. Not towels.

As long as he’s lived in his current home, they’ve had issues with him unrolling the toilet paper onto the floor. Who knows why…he never did it at home that I can remember. Given that the staff at his home wont really get in his face and yell at him for it, he’ll probably never stop. Anyway, they’ve realized that there is a pattern to his paper unrolling… He does it when he has snow days or other interruptions to his usual schedule…almost like he’s mad about not being able to do what he’s supposed to do, so that’s his little way of lashing out.

The third one is my favorite… Just inside the front door of his home, there’s a bathroom. Mostly intended for guests and the staff, I assume. There are bathrooms for the residents in both hallways by their bedrooms. For whatever reason, Jon has decided he’d rather use the bathroom in the foyer. When the staff sees him head for that bathroom, they redirect him to the one by his bedroom. I don’t know if he makes a fuss about it or not, but he hasn’t given up. The staff has watched him sneak out the back door, walk around the house and come in the front door so he can get to that front bathroom without being seen.

Just makes you wonder exactly what that kid knows. He doesn’t know today is Monday, but he knows how to outsmart the adults who don’t want him to use the bathroom in the front of the house. There are plenty of other similar stories that have made us all shake our heads over the years…I’ll post them as I think of them.

Amazing what a few coats of paint can do...

Said Sara, "You're the poet in my heart
Never change, never stop
But now it's gone
It doesn't matter what for
But when you build your house
Well, then call me home."
-Stevie Nicks

I know I've been promising before and after pictures of the house for six months now... And finally -- here they are. They're not so much "after" as "now." There is still plenty to do and plenty to rearrange. Havent decided what to hang where, so the majority of the walls are bare. But plenty of you have asked for pics, so here's how the place looks so far.... (I apologize for how long this list is, but blogspot is less than cooperative placing photos...if anyone has mastered placing pictures side by side, please let me know. I finally gave up...)

The Guest Bedroom... (Yes, those are two shades of blue on the walls -- it's not just the photo. I'm inheriting some bedroom furniture with my grandparents' move, which will allow me to throw out my last piece of Sauder, nailed together particle board "furniture," which furnished my entire first apartment. The dresser pictured has broken and missing pulls and the bottom drawer wont open. It's time to turn the poor thing into firewood....)
My Bedroom... (Oddly enough, the white, flowery curtains the previous owner left behind match my childhood bedspread -- and they make good paint drop cloths... I have some leftover fabric from the blue curtains -- eventually I'll make a couple matching throw pillows.)



The Family Room... (When I first looked at the house, my realtor said it would take some "vision" to love this house. Exhibit A: The Pink Family Room. Truly hideous.)

The Kitchen... (These pictures are a little out of order, but you get the idea. The kitchen was ugly. Then it was gutted. Now it's burgundy.)

The only room left to paint is the dining room -- it's still sort of a dingy mint green on two walls, but I cant decide what color to paint it yet. Seems to be a trend with me. I also have some trim to paint, but that's fairly low on the priority list. I think that's enough for today. I'll post the dining room when it's finished -- it too is inheriting some new furniture soon, so I'll probably wait until then to take any "after" shots.

It's funny...It seems like I've accomplished a lot since I've moved in....But the to-do list never really goes away, does it?

Jonathan

“Maple syrup is supposed to be on the table before the pancakes.
Of course when they bring the maple syrup after the pancakes, it'll definitely be too late.”
-Rain Man

My friend Robin recently pointed me towards a blog – “Confessions of a Pioneer Woman” that has gotten me thinking recently. The Pioneer Woman writes (a lot), she takes pictures (gorgeous ones) and she cooks. One topic of interest to me? Her brother, Mike. Her first entry about Mike starts like this:

“I Have a Retarded Brother. His Name is Mike.

I love not having to whip out annoying euphemisms like "Developmentally Disabled" or "Mentally Challenged" or "Intellectually Delayed." As a blood relative of a retarded person, I’m automatically exempt. I get to say retarded. Retarded.

I love Mike. He’s my big brother. Well, he’s my older brother. I’m bigger. Taller. About 8 inches taller. Overall, having Mike as a brother has been a good thing.”

Most anyone reading this probably already knows why it struck a chord with me. I, too, have a retarded brother. His name is Jon. I nodded knowingly when I read her comments about euphemisms and the rights afforded a blood relative. Because Jon is retarded. He’s not developmentally delayed or challenged. He’s retarded. I realize that’s not the PC way to say it anymore and I absolutely hate how that word has morphed into the common vernacular. I cringe every time I hear someone say “You’re retarded…That show was retarded…This game is retarded.” When I say something “un-PC” about Jon or the people that surround him, I usually preface it with, “he’s my brother, I can say that.” I had no idea that other siblings of retarded people also said that.

I too, catch myself having to explain that he’s my older brother but more like a younger brother. I admit sometimes I dread when someone making small talk asks if I have any siblings. Because you can never leave it at just “Yes.” It’s always followed up with “older or younger?” No one ever expects that there isn’t a short way to answer that.

“Well, he’s older, but he’s mentally retarded, so he’s sort of like a younger brother.” That usually gets a tilted head and an “Aww, I’m sorry to hear that. That must have been hard on you.” I never really know how to answer that. Would life have been easier on all involved if he had been “normal?” Who knows. Would he have been an angelic, straight A student with an equal aptitude for athletics and the arts? Probably not. He probably would have had his own “normal” issues that we, as a family would have to deal with. I was “normal.” And by “normal,” I mean a moody, bratty teenager. I got good grades, but I argued and back-talked daily. Jon is what he is and, not knowing anything different, I’ve gotten used to that.

It’s funny. I don’t think of myself as different because of Jon. It’s just not something I think about all that often. Over the years, people have said that I’m probably a more compassionate person, more patient, more understanding of people who are different. Obviously everyone is a product of their surroundings – I sometimes wonder what I would have been like if Jon had been a normal big brother.

As I read through some of the reader comments attached to Pioneer Woman’s blog, they’re all positive. They all commend her for her funny, heartwarming stories. Because that’s all they are to them. Sweet stories. I read her entries about Mike with tears in my eyes, understanding every word, feeling like I’d just met a kind of kindred spirit. Even tho it seems her experience with her brother is worlds different from mine, everything she said rang true to me.

It’s funny. I read things all the time that I agree with or that “speak to me,” I don’t know why these particular blogs have gotten me thinking about Jon. One comment Robin made was that if PW’s blog did anything to open the eyes of her zillions of readers, that she’s doing a really good thing by talking about her brother.

And maybe in my own rambling way, I can do the same thing.